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We’re all aging every day, and this includes our parents.

Thinking or talking about our parents’ passing can be hard. However, as they’re getting older, you might find yourself in a difficult position when you attempt to handle their financial and healthcare demands. 

Therefore, it’s time to start now

But before consulting with an estate planning attorney, read on the 12 Steps to Estate Planning for Elderly Parents, as we try to not only provide clarity on the process but also offer peace of mind as you work together to secure your parents’ financial well-being and ensure a seamless transition of their assets to future generations.

Key Takeaways

  • It’s crucial for your elderly parents to have estate planning so things can be under control after they pass and avoid a probate process.
  • Your parents will need to appoint beneficiaries, trustees, and personal representatives to manage their estates after they pass. 
  • Always work with an experienced estate planning attorney for consultation, legal advice, and document preparation, which can give you and your parents ease of mind.

Writing things down

Step 1: Initiate a Conversation with Your Elderly Parents About Estate Planning

It’s important to first initiate a conversation with your parents about what is estate planning or briefly talk about how to practice estate planning.

But it may not be easy to bring up this sensitive topic. The following tips may be helpful for your conversation:

  1. Choose the Right Time and Place: Find a quiet and comfortable setting where you can have a relaxed conversation without interruptions. Ensure that everyone involved feels at ease.
  2. Express Your Concern and Love: Begin the conversation by expressing your love and concern for your parents’ well-being. Let them know that your intentions are to ensure their wishes are respected.
  3. Explain the Importance: Clearly communicate the importance of estate planning. Mention the benefits of having a plan in place, such as ensuring their assets are distributed according to their wishes and avoiding legal complications.
  4. Share Personal Stories: Share personal stories or examples of friends or family members who faced challenges due to a lack of estate planning. Real-life scenarios can help illustrate the importance of the topic.
  5. Listen Actively and Be Patient: Give your parents plenty of time to express their thoughts and concerns. Be patient. Be a good listener and avoid interrupting or imposing your own ideas.
  6. Keep Notes: Keep a detailed record of your conversations with your parents because it is an ongoing conversation. Your parents may change their wishes, so it is best to have something to refer to.
  7. Respect Their Autonomy: Acknowledge that it’s their estate and their decisions ultimately. Assure them that you want to support their wishes and choices.
  8. Highlight Potential Benefits: Emphasize how estate planning can provide peace of mind not only for them but also for the entire family. It can also help minimize financial and emotional stress during difficult times.
  9. Consult With an Estate Planning Attorney: An experienced estate planning attorney can help draft the estate plan documents, but they’re also capable of suggesting topics that you may not have thought of.

Step 2: Help Your Elderly Parents Determine Their Estate Planning Goals

If the first conversations went well, now is time to help your elderly parents to determine their estate planning goals:

  1. Asset Protection:
    • Protecting the assets of elderly parents from potential creditors, lawsuits, or financial mismanagement, especially if there are concerns about long-term care costs.
  2. Healthcare Planning:
    • Ensuring that elderly parents have comprehensive healthcare planning in place, including medical powers of attorney, living wills, and other advance directives.
    • Securing access to quality healthcare and long-term care, whether through insurance or financial arrangements.
  3. Financial Security:
    • Establishing a financial plan that guarantees the parents’ financial security throughout their retirement years.
    • Ensuring that parents have sufficient income and resources to maintain their desired lifestyle.
  4. Minimizing Tax Implications:
    • Implementing strategies to minimize estate taxes, gift taxes, and income taxes for both the parents and the beneficiaries.
    • Utilizing available tax exemptions and deductions effectively.
  5. Smooth Asset Transition:
    • Ensuring that assets are transferred seamlessly upon the parents’ passing, avoiding probate delays and expenses.
    • Setting up trusts, joint ownership, or beneficiary designations to simplify the asset transfer process.
  6. Preserving Family Harmony:
    • Minimizing the potential for conflicts among family members by clearly outlining the estate plan and addressing any concerns or expectations.
    • Designating an executor or trustee who can maintain impartiality and fairness.
  7. Care for Special Needs Children:
    • Planning for the ongoing care and financial support of adult children with disabilities or special needs.
    • Establishing special needs trusts to provide for these children without jeopardizing their eligibility for government assistance programs.
  8. Charitable Giving: Facilitating any charitable intentions of the elderly parents by incorporating charitable bequests or establishing charitable trusts or foundations.
  9. Protecting the Surviving Spouse: Ensuring that a surviving spouse is financially secure and well-provided for in the event of the other spouse’s passing.
  10. Maintaining Privacy: Maintaining privacy regarding estate planning matters, especially for elderly parents who value discretion.
  11. Planning for Long-Term Care: Addressing potential long-term care needs, such as nursing home or assisted living costs, by considering insurance or financial arrangements.
  12. Preserving Family Home: Determining what should happen to the family home and how it fits into the estate plan, especially if there are multiple siblings or complex family dynamics.
  13. Documenting End-of-Life Preferences: Ensuring that end-of-life preferences, such as burial or cremation choices, are documented and respected.

Step 3: Create a List of Your Parent’s Assets and Debts

Documenting your elderly parents’ assets can make the process straightforward and smooth, because you’ll have a better understanding of what the remainder of the estate will be distributed to your parents’ chosen beneficiaries.

Here is the list of potential assets and debts to consider:


  1. Real Estate:
    • Primary residence
    • Vacation homes or rental properties
    • Commercial real estate
  2. Financial Accounts:
    • Checking accounts
    • Savings accounts
    • Certificates of deposit (CDs)
    • Money market accounts
  3. Investments:
    • Stocks and bonds
    • Mutual funds
    • Exchange-traded funds (ETFs)
    • Retirement accounts (e.g., 401(k), IRA, Roth IRA)
    • Annuities
  4. Business Interests:
    • Ownership stakes in businesses or partnerships
    • Sole proprietorships
  5. Personal Property:
    • Vehicles (cars, boats, RVs)
    • Jewelry
    • Artwork and collectibles
    • Furniture and household items
  6. Life Insurance:
    • Cash value of life insurance policies
    • Death benefit amounts
  7. Other Investments:
    • Precious metals (e.g., gold, silver)
    • Cryptocurrency holdings
  8. Beneficial Interests:
    • Trusts
    • Annuities
    • Future inheritances


  1. Mortgages:
    • Remaining balances on all properties with mortgages
  2. Loans:
    • Personal loans
    • Auto loans
    • Student loans
    • Credit card balances
  3. Taxes:
    • Federal income taxes
    • State income taxes
    • Property taxes
    • Estate taxes (if applicable)
  4. Medical Bills: Unpaid medical expenses
  5. Outstanding Debts: Any other debts or obligations, such as personal loans from family members or friends
  6. Funeral and Burial Expenses: Prepaid funeral or burial expenses
  7. Legal Obligations: Legal judgments or settlements
  8. Business Debts: Any outstanding debts related to business ownership or partnerships

Having all of this information will give you and your aging parents a better understanding of the residual of their estate. 

Step 4: Determine Their Wishes

Discuss your parents’ wishes for their estate, ask open-ended questions to help them make decisions. For example:

  • “What are your priorities when it comes to distributing your assets?”
  • “Is there a particular charity or cause you’d like to support?”
  • “Are there any specific family members you want to provide for?”
  • “Do you have any concerns about potential taxes or legal complications?”

Step 5: Invite Your Elderly Parents to Consult with an Attorney

Every legal transaction involves some form of contract. From business deals to estate planning to personal injury incidents, having a lawyer by your side that cares about you and your needs is crucial.

Make sure you work with a trusted estate planning lawyer who understands that your contracts and the presentation thereof are important and valuable.

Invitation from Springdale Law Group

Springdale Law Group is one of a few law firms that ensure the well-being and future of yourself and your family by assisting in drafting, reviewing, and finalizing your agreements and contracts. Our team is fluent in English, Chinese, and Spanish and can assist with wealth management and estate planning in all 50 states.

Contact us today and take the first step in securing a plan for you and your loved ones’ future. Let us help you make a plan that provides peace of mind.

Springdale Law Group

(Springdale Law Group is your trusted Estate Planning Experts)

Step 6: Select Beneficiaries 

Selecting beneficiaries is the most crucial step to estate planning for your elderly parents. 

A beneficiary in the broadest sense is a natural person or other legal entity who receives money or other benefits from a benefactor.

This person or persons is the one(s) that your parents wish to leave their money or other benefits to. 

It could be your parents’ children, grandchildren, a surviving spouse, or even a charitable organization. 

Selecting beneficiaries will help stop fighting amongst family members after your parents’ passing and help your Personal Representative or Trustee distribute your estate.

Step 7: Select a Successor Trustee or Personal Representative

Selecting a successor trustee or personal representative (also known as an executor) is an important decision when setting up your elderly parents’ estate plan or will. 

These individuals will be responsible for managing their affairs and distributing their assets. 

Here are two scenarios: 

If your parents chose to create a Trust, the person who manages their estate after their passing is the Successor Trustee. 

If they make a Last Will and Testament, the person executing the estate is the Personal Representative.

Here are some of their major responsibilities:

Successor Trustee

  • Manage Trust Assets; Follow Trust Terms; Record Keeping; Communication; Investment Management; Pay Debts and Taxes; Distributions; Legal and Fiduciary Duties. 

Personal Representative (Executor)

  • Probate Administration; Identify and Value Assets; Pay Debts and Expenses; Manage and Protect Assets; File Tax Returns; Distribute Assets; Court Filings and Reporting. 

Eventually, selecting a successor trustee or personal representative is a significant decision that requires careful thought and consideration.

Consulting with an estate planning attorney can provide valuable guidance in making the right choice for your unique circumstances.

Step 8: Gather Important Documents

Right after you begin the process of estate planning for your elderly parents, you should gather all necessary documents and keep them in one place. This will make the entire process less stressful and go smoothly. 

Some important documents for estate planning are:

  • Property Deeds
  • Bank account information
  • Brokerage account information
  • Retirement account information
  • Life Insurance information
  • Business investment and share certificates
  • Promissory notes
  • Beneficiary designations

Step 9: Document Burial Wishes

Documenting burial wishes is significant in estate planning for your elderly parents. 

During the discussion, you can ask them if they would like to be cremated or buried and how they would like their ashes to be distributed. Here are some other burial wishes to consider as well:

  • Location of Burial
  • Type of Burial Plot
  • Funeral Service or Memorial Preferences
  • Music and Readings
  • Floral Arrangements

Passing is the last journey is our lives, so keep your parents’ burial wishes documented, communicate this with your family and loved ones. This is extra important if your parents have religious traditions to follow. 

Step 10: Create Estate Planning Documents for Elderly Parents

After your parents make the decision to start the estate planning process, it’s time for them to draft the required documents, maybe with your help.

Create estate planning documents for elderly parents, including:

Living Trust or Last Will and Testament

Deciding between a living trust and a last will and testament depends on your individual circumstances, goals, and preferences.

To create a living trust, you typically work with an estate planning attorney. The process involves drafting the trust document, transferring ownership of your assets into the trust, and naming a successor trustee who will manage the trust’s assets and distribute them to beneficiaries upon your parents’ passing.

The same goes with creating a last will and testament. This generally includes identification, executor appointment, asset inventory, beneficiary designations, specific requests, residuary clause and more. 

Financial Power of Attorney

The purpose is to appoint an agent to make financial decisions and manage your elderly parents’ affairs if they become incapacitated.

Medical Power of Attorney

This is used to assign a trusted individual to make medical decisions on your parents’ behalf.

Living Will

A Living Will, also known as an Advance Healthcare Directive, is a legal document that allows you to outline your parents’ preferences and instructions for medical treatment and end-of-life care in case they become incapacitated and are unable to communicate their wishes. 

Step 11: Discuss Long-Term Care Planning Options

With the help of an experienced estate planning attorney, discuss long=term care planning options too.

When unexpected illness or injuries happen, this requires long-term care planning. 

So, you should help out your parents to make a plan ahead of time. 

For example, the average cost of long term care in the US is from $59,488 to $108, 405 per year. Paying these costs out of pocket can diminish your parent’s wealth, and they may be forced to sell large assets to pay for care.

A long-term care planning can give your parents financial protection, choice of control, quality of care, medical eligibility, estate preservation, and peace of mind.

Step 12: Regularly Review and Update

Lastly, after doing all the steps, you can now finally sit and relax a little because you just did a big favor for your elderly parents. 

You will then just need to regularly review and update the plan, keep in touch with your estate planning attorney and make sure things go smoothly.


Today, we reviewed 12 steps to estate planning for your elderly parents.

From starting a conversation with them to discussing long-term planning options, work with a trusted estate planning attorney is always a great choice. 

Springdale Law Group is here to help formulate a full plan for your family after their passing that protects your interests, their interests, and helps avoid conflict and costly probate court.

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